Taking the Stress Out of Baby Milestones

You are out of the Newborn phase! However, your doctor is now talking about baby milestones? When should my child start crawling? Should I be concerned my baby doesn’t babble? Is it realistic to expect my baby to walk by one? In this episode we are going over baby milestones to take the stress out of what to expect!

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Episode Transcript

Kaile Hunt 0:09
You are out of the newborn phase, yay, but now your doctor is talking about baby milestones. When Should my child start crawling? Should I be concerned my baby doesn't babble, and is it realistic to expect my baby to walk by one in this episode, we are going over baby milestones to take the stress out of what to expect. Thanks for joining us. This is newbies.

Kaile Hunt 1:06
Welcome to newbies. My name is Kaile Hunt, and I'll be your host today if you haven't already, be sure to visit our website, at New mommy media.com and subscribe to our weekly newsletter, which keeps you updated on all the episodes we release each week. Another great way to stay updated is to hit that subscribe button in our podcast app. And if you are looking for a way to get even more involved with our show, then check out our online community. It's called Mighty moms. That's where we chat more about the topics discussed here on our show, and it's also an easy way to learn about our recording. So you can join us live. Our expert today is Dr Allie chisel, who graduated with her Bachelor of Science in Exercise Science and Doctorate of physical therapy in an accelerated program at Simmons College in Boston, Massachusetts, she has been practicing in pediatrics in various settings during the last five years. Dr Ali loves working with little ones and their families. We love to hear that, and she has found the most success when children are able to receive care in their own home. Also love that on this podcast, whether in person or virtually, with their biggest supporters participating in their plan of care, she works from a holistic approach, taking into consideration all body systems when creating a plan of care and making sure to address caregivers biggest questions and concerns in a supportive and responsive manner. She specializes in working with infants and toddlers. Who that was a mouthful. Dr Ali, thank you for being here. Please tell us more about your practice and your family.

Allison Chisholm 2:32
I'm so happy to be here. Yeah, so I, I am a pediatric physical therapist. I work with mainly infants and toddlers in person in seacoast, New Hampshire, as well as virtually worldwide. So to increase that in accessibility for for families and their little ones, so I actually have two babies myself. I have a an almost three year old, and then I also have a 14 month old. She's 14 months old today, so I do have, like a young toddler. And then I have a little bit of a middle, the middle ground toddler. So I kind of became really passionate about this work. I've always loved working in pediatrics, but I became really passionate about this work, specifically after I had my own babies, and realized that there was not a lot out there. That's not confusing for moms. So I think a lot of what's on social media, there's a lot of conflicting information, there's a lot of, like, influx of information, and it's hard to sort through. So that's why I created the moving peanut. Is to create that confidence and clarity when it comes to your little one's movement versus all the confusion that you can get from social media. I love that.

Kaile Hunt 3:37
And you said you had a three year old and a 14 month old, you did two under two. Holy moly, that's a lot.

Allison Chisholm 3:44
Yes, I did. I did. It was a journey, for sure. It still is, but it gets easier. There's

Kaile Hunt 3:50
Absolutely I'm excited, and I love that you mentioned social media. I actually found you from your Instagram. Handler loved your Instagram, and I love, I do love social media. I will say that however, like you said, there's a lot of conflicting information, especially when it comes to baby milestones, like what one mother posts about her 12 month old is something completely different that my 12 month old is doing, you know? So I love that we get to dive deep into that today. Thank you. Of course, next we have a few mamas here. We love and we have moms on the podcast. Erica casteman is a mother of two, and Erica, thank you so much for joining us. Please tell us about your family and wish your little son a happy birthday. I knew His birthday was coming up, but I didn't know how soon.

Erica Castanan 4:36
Well, thank you so much, Kaile. It is great to be here with you. And yes, Kaylee is right. I am a mom of two. I have a three year old son and a just newly one year old son. So I have been a mom now for alcohol over three years, and it has been quite the journey. And when Kaylee said this was a. Milestone. It's very interesting because when you have to, like Dr Ali said, you get to see it from two different perspectives, and you also realize that your oldest has gone through everything once already, so you feel a little bit more prepared and relaxed. But I'm very excited to hear from this conversation what our different experiences have been like with those very important milestones.

Kaile Hunt 5:28
Yay. We are so excited. I love having moms of different backgrounds. I only have one daughter. You have two boys. And lastly, we have Liz, who's joining us as well. Liz, thank you for being here. Please tell us more about your family.

Liz Juarez 5:42
Hi, thank you for having me. So I just have one little boy, and he just turned 19 months. He was born January, 2023 and I'm hoping maybe in the future I'll try for another one. But yeah, I'm just a stay at home mama right now, and I love spending time with my baby.

Kaile Hunt 6:06
We that's Yeah. We love that. Thanks for joining. I will also be chiming in on my experience with navigating the stress of baby milestones, especially as a first time mom. I'm excited to have ally and Erica on to talk about their experiences with dealing with baby milestones with their second kid, you know, to kind of compare. I know you're not supposed to compare, but who knows. People do anyway. But we will talk all about this and more right after this quick break. Today, we're discussing baby milestones, and trying to take the stress out of it for new moms. So this first section is just for ally. Let's just chat about baby milestones. So kind of dumb them down for maybe some new moms who are listening to the podcast, who still have a newborn, or maybe moms who are just now being told to watch out for milestones. So can you just explain a little bit about what are baby milestones? Yeah.

Allison Chisholm 7:02
So basically, the baby milestones that come up is you will see a lot of information about all of these, like milestone information. So basically, with baby milestones, we're really talking about newborn to the, like first year, like the when babies turn one. I typically think about it as in newborns to walking kiddos, even though kiddos technically turn into toddlers when they're 12 months old, I really think that, you know, they continue to be babies up until that time that they're walking because of the fact that there's just so much happening in that length of time. But basically, with baby milestones, it doesn't just include, like the gross motor skills, which is what I specialize in, like rolling and sitting, crawling, walking, all of those things. It also includes things like their cognitive abilities, their communicative abilities, their abilities to perform fine motor skills, their abilities to babble and chat, and all those things as well. So it's not just the gross motor skills. I think that we hear a lot about the gross motor piece, but it's basically setting the foundation for kiddos that they are building on to do bigger things and like bigger movements, bigger skills, bigger tasks along the way, so when they're older. So we're setting the foundation in that first year of life to be able to do those things, like be able to write when they're in school. Be able to play sports without them having any hindrances with that. Be able to potentially, you know, if a baby is experiencing head flattening, can we help round out their heads so that they're not having issues with like a sports helmet later on, things like that. So it's setting that foundation for skills later on in life.

Kaile Hunt 8:43
I have a few follow up questions, I guess. The first one is, how important is it to seek help? If you feel like your child is kind of falling behind, you know the curve of what a normal baby milestone should be,

Allison Chisholm 8:56
yeah. So the common misconception a lot of pediatricians do say things like this, not to knock pediatricians, because there are wonderful ones out there, but this wait and see approach, and unfortunately, with that approach, if that is taken into consideration and then that is followed a lot of the times, what can happen is that kiddos will compensate in a different way, and what that means is, is that they'll learn these compensation patterns to move a certain way or eat a certain way, or talk a certain way. And that might work for them in the interim, but it might not work for them long term. And then when you when you try to address those problems later on, it's a lot harder, because the child has formed that habit as well as you know, strengthened that area or strengthened that habit that they are using. So we have to work backwards, and that can be really, really hard and take a lot longer for therapy in order to do that. So if parents have concerns, or pediatricians have concerns, rather than a wait and see approach, I always encourage even like, even if it's. Of evaluation or having a quick consult with like a pediatric therapist, like someone like me, it can be really, really helpful to gain clarity on whether or not your child will benefit from from services earlier on, so that they don't develop issues along the way that could be harder to address. Does that make sense? No, it

Kaile Hunt 10:19
totally makes sense. And I guess what I want to ask next is, let's talk about some specific milestones, right? So let's say three months to four months, what should babies kind of be doing? Or What should parents be looking out for to make sure that their baby is following, you know, the milestones? Yeah,

Allison Chisholm 10:34
yeah. So three to four months, that's really when babies are able to, like you hear tummy time a lot. So just starting off with tummy time, babies are able to be on their bellies, be able to prop up on their four forearms and be able to lift up their head in a way that's functional for them. So they're not like they're not struggling on their bellies. They're able to functionally hold that position. But you might see a little bit of head bobbing, things like that. By the time they're four months, you really want to see them be able to keep their head up, turn their head side to side, all of those things, and be really strong on their bellies by three to four months, also you'll start to see that the rolling milestone come up. So basically, typically, you will see back to belly first, because babies are now placed on their back to sleep. But originally, belly to back was actually seen first, because it's actually an easier skill than back to belly. But that changed once the back to sleep campaign started in the 90s, so we actually see back to belly first, and that typically is our Yeah, that typically is babies lifting up their toes and reaching for their toes when they're on their back, and then rolling to their side and making their way onto their belly by the time they're between, like, three to six, three to five months old. And then belly to back happens either first or it can happen after that. And typically we want babies to be rolling back to Belly, belly to back by the time they're six to seven months old. And then, in terms of, like, fine motor skills, what we're really looking for is like, Can baby hold, reach for and hold the toy or hold something in their hand by the time that they're four months old? We want them to be really be able to switch an object in their hand. So if they're like, sitting in your lap and they're holding something, can they switch that object from one hand to another by the time that they're four months old? And then also in that time, that's when you might start to hear a little bit more babbling. Typically, between four to six months is when you really start to hear more of that babbling, but you might start to hear some of that before then too.

Kaile Hunt 12:29
How interesting? And speaking of babbling, that was my next question. I vividly remember, I was actually at a wedding with my daughter and my husband, and it was just like a light switch went off. Maybe because the environment we were around. My daughter was about six and a half, seven months old. People were talking. That's when I started to really hear her babble. But what is a babble supposed to sound like? My daughter was saying, like, bah, bah, bah. And I was like, I think that's babbling, because she kept doing it for the first time. But what kind of sounds for these new moms? Is like a true babble supposed to hear like or is it subjective and different from baby to baby? Yeah,

Allison Chisholm 13:04
it can be subjective and it can be different from baby to baby. I never think that there's one way that a child is going to start communicating like they might start communicating via different ways, like their movements, their sounds, their eye contact, things like that. But in true terms of babbling, what you're really looking for is that like, ba, ba, ba, Gaga, things like that. It might not be super pronounced in terms of like, the consonant sounds right away, but you will start to hear that more and more as time progresses.

Kaile Hunt 13:38
I love that. Yeah, definitely, because babies make all sorts of funny, cute, weird, sometimes sounds but I remember around six to seven months is when it really amped up and it was like, daily, multiple times a day. She was like, talking back to us. It was so cute, I

Allison Chisholm 13:54
mean, and it's also fun too, because, like, they really started to explore their vocal chords and explore, like, how loud can they be? How what different sounds they can be? Like, I know, like, I work with a lot of babies who, like, love to just, like, randomly start screaming, and then it's really, yeah, it's really, really cute. But it's also like, Oh, my God, shocks

Kaile Hunt 14:13
wrong. Yeah, yeah. I'm sure we have all we're all moms. We've been in the grocery store, and our our kid is just screaming, and we know they're fine, but you know, people don't.

Allison Chisholm 14:22
Oh, exactly, exactly.

Kaile Hunt 14:25
Oh, fun stuff. Great. Last little question about milestones is, so what type of milestones should kids, babies, infants, start to be doing around the nine month up to a year mark?

Allison Chisholm 14:35
Yeah, so nine months to a year is when kiddos really start being a lot more mobile, which I love. So the first form of mobility for babies is the rolling. So a lot of times like that's why I really stress on that rolling is because the fact that that's their first introduction to transitions and getting from point A to point B, or from one position to another, and then by nine to 12. Of months, that's where you're seeing kiddos actually being able to mobilize themselves. So they might have started army crawling beforehand and getting themselves from eight point A to point B, but this is when you really see them starting to transition like in and out, of sitting in and out of hands and knees, getting onto their hands and knees and crawling on hands and knees, starting to pull to stand and work on their pre walking skills as well. So pulling to stand, cruising or sidestepping along surfaces, being able to explore standing independently, maybe they'll start to transition between furniture that are placed a couple of feet apart. There's a there's a lot of mobility pieces that can happen between nine to 12 months old, but those are some of the key ones that you'll probably see.

Kaile Hunt 15:43
I love that you answered the one about if your baby is not hitting milestones, but let's flip it right, let's say your baby is just totally hitting milestones ahead of schedule. You always hear about the early walkers at nine months and the early crawlers at four months. I mean, does that really happen? And what as a parent, if you have, you know, a child hitting milestones early, what tips, tricks, I guess, advice would you give to them? Yeah, so

Allison Chisholm 16:08
I see this a lot, and it's there's nothing necessarily wrong or normal about it. But the key thing to think about is, if you're on the other side of the situation where your baby might like you have a friend that has a baby who's walking at seven months, just know for yourself that that's not typical. I don't want to say that's not normal, because if there's not It's not abnormal to see that some babies doing those earlier skills. But the average age, for example, for walking is from 10 to, like, 18 months. It's a really broad range. So if you see kiddos start to do those bigger milestones prior to that, I would say, one, I know it's so hard not to compare, but definitely don't compare your little one to that child, because that child is definitely more advanced in those gross motor skills. Two, I also think about like, okay, they might be walking, but are they walking functionally? Are they walking in a way? Did they skip crawling? And that's why they're walking so thinking about like, not necessarily thinking about like, what could be wrong, but also like, thinking and keeping in the back of my mind, like, are they sequentially meeting those milestones? Like, are they sequentially going from ruling to sitting to to crawling to, you know, pulling to stand and walking like, Did they hit those sequential milestones, or did they skip something along the way? And then, thirdly, what I really like to think about is, a lot of the times when I see kiddos have those advanced milestones and meet those skills really, really early. The reason is, is because their brain and their body is so focused on, say, for example, gross motor that maybe something else has been pushed to the back burner. So for instance, a lot of the times I've actually seen this with kiddos who are really early walkers, they end up actually needing help with speech because they're delayed in their speech area of development. So those are things to keep in mind. Not to say that that's something that is going to happen with your baby, if your baby does tend to walk earlier or meet those milestones early, but it is something that I keep in mind. Another thing that, just as a side note, sometimes I'll see people say that their newborn is like rolling from belly to back. And while that is totally true, you can totally see that I also look at like, are they functionally rolling from belly to back? Is it like, are they just tipping over and losing their balance when they're on their belly because they're holding a lot of tension in their arms and their shoulders? Or are they, like, truly, like, purposefully rolling belly to back? So it's like, one of those things, like, I look at as a PT, I have to look at like, the caveats of that. And I also say there might be something else going on underneath the surface that you can pay attention to and not to compare to other kids that might be going through that as well. I

Kaile Hunt 18:51
love that. That is such great advice. And I think we've all been there as new moms, especially where you're like, oh my goodness, my daughter did this. Oh, and it's like, no, they're just a baby.

Allison Chisholm 19:03
Yeah, exactly, exactly.

Kaile Hunt 19:06
That's great, perfect. Thank you. We are milestone questions coming up, and we will hear more from our mamas on the episode right after this break. Welcome back to newbies. We are going all over, taking the stress out of baby milestones. So this next section is for our mamas who are on the call today. First question is for anyone really, just chime in, did your little one crawl by six months? I know that's kind of on social media, you know, a number to look out for, but you know, did your little one crawl by six months. I will say mine was an early crawler. She crawled around five months. But it wasn't, it wasn't accurate. It was like the army crawl.

Allison Chisholm 19:49
I can chime in too, really quick on this one as well. Just as like an aside, like the army crawling piece is, like, there's army crawling, so like, what your little one was probably doing, and then there's also crawling on hand. And knees. In the PT of therapy world, it's actually called creeping. So hands and knees crawling is like different than regular army crawling. So just as an aside,

Kaile Hunt 20:09
I love that. No. Thank you. Yeah, of course,

Erica Castanan 20:12
yeah. For my oldest, I think similar to you, Kaylee, like before six months was doing a lot of army crawling. I remember that just being something. He was doing a lot, and then I think by six months, is when he finally attempted on hands and knees. And was getting closer to about seven months. By the time he could get around pretty well. My youngest one, who just turned one, he was actually a lot leader. He was probably at the end of about eight months when he was crawling punctually on hands and knees. He didn't really attempt to do much army crawling. So I could say it was maybe like a matter of days of just trying to army crawl to then just going to arm spin and or to hands and knees,

Kaile Hunt 21:01
perfect. What about you? Liz,

Speaker 2 21:03
yeah, for my son, he actually didn't start early crawling. I do remember him getting on his hands and knees pretty early on, like five, six months, but he actually didn't start like crawling until he was like eight months. What

Kaile Hunt 21:21
about walking? So I know that's another hot topic. I remember like I was in bed one night and I saw on Tiktok, this mom posted for her nine month old checkup that, you know, her son was just walking by nine months. And I was like, There's no way that's even possible. Anyway, my daughter started walking around 11 months, and even then, from a couple of my girlfriends, that's even considered, you know, a little bit early. So Liz, tossing it back over to you, when did your son start walking?

Speaker 2 21:49
So he started walking also, I wouldn't say early, but it wasn't late either. So he turned 12 months, and then I was kind of getting worried. I was like, is he supposed to start walking already? And I was kind of, like, nervous about it. And I had gone to like, this party, and there was, like, little babies like his age there, and a lot of them were already, like, walking. And I was like, Oh my gosh. Like, they're they turned a year and they're already walking, and my baby's not. And then a month later, when you turn 13 months, I love

Kaile Hunt 22:25
that. What about you, Erica, and especially with both of your sons, I love that you have to

Erica Castanan 22:30
Yeah. So my like I said, our oldest, he was actually over a year. He was almost 13 months. So similar to you, Liz. And then my youngest is is not walking yet. He is definitely moving and cruising around furniture and taking attempts to stand on his own, but he is not walking. And I think I had similar thoughts to you, Liz, with my first son, of just wondering, like, is this going to happen? When is it going to happen. And now I've kind of taken off that stress off myself. When looking at my youngest son, I think that it will probably happen in a similar fashion, where it'll be just over a year, where he will begin to walk. My

Kaile Hunt 23:15
follow up question for both you ladies is, because I know, from my experience, I don't know why, but baby milestones just stress me out. I don't I don't know why, because whether my daughter walked at 12 months or 16 months, I would still love her the same, you know, and she would still be cared for and and nothing really would change all that much, other than, you know, maybe seeking some outside help. But it just stressed me out whether she would crawl on time babble, is she actually saying one or two words? Is that Mama, or is she just screeching? You know what I mean? Anyway, to go back onto the question, are you guys, or were you guys ever just concerned about your child meeting milestones? And maybe I'll toss it first over to you Erica, maybe for your first son or your firstborn other than your second. Yes. So

Erica Castanan 23:59
I remember googling everything. I remember saving screenshots and bookmarking a bunch of pages online about particular milestones within the first year and wondering if he was going to meet them, because I felt like he did meet most milestones, except for the walking one pretty quickly or right around the time that it's expected. And so I was definitely somebody who was paying a lot of attention to when it was being met. And it did start to, I think, become something that was a point of, like, sadness sometimes when, when talking to other moms and not being able to say, Oh yeah, he's walking or he's doing this. But I know like now, beyond those milestones, the other milestones, of like talking and gestures things that do. On my youngest was he'll be able to do like I am. I am obviously mindful and and keeping track of what he is doing, but I just don't think I'm as obsessive over every single thing that's happening. But similar like, if I were to have concerns like, I think I would be able to tell the pediatrician and figure out what things to do to help encourage him take those next steps, versus me trying to fit him into what's outlined online for everyone else to see.

Kaile Hunt 25:30
Most definitely. Liz, what about you did milestones now stress you out in the early days and months?

Speaker 2 25:36
Oh, yeah, definitely. But I think I would stress out for like, a couple of days, and I'd do the same thing as Erica. I'd like be Googling stuff and be like, you should be eating this already, but then, but then, I would talk to some of my friends. So good thing about me is that I do have a couple of friends that had babies a lot earlier than I did. So I would always ask them, like, questions about, like, When did your baby started doing this? And then they would be like, Oh, no, you're fine. Like, my baby didn't start doing this until this age or this month. And it would kind of reassure me a little bit when I talked to them, and I would be like, okay, it's fine. And then another thing that I did do that also helped me a lot when I didn't want to, like, bother my friends, you know, and ask them a bunch of questions all the time. I had that pregnancy app that you download, and there's kind of like, a community forum on there, and I remember I joined it when I was pregnant, and then I would ask questions on there. And there's a lot of mamas that ask questions on there, and I joined the the like, month and year that my baby was born. So all the mamas kind of have, like, the same age group babies. And I just would look at the questions that other mamas would ask, and it was a lot of the same questions of, like, when is your does your baby start doing this or start doing that? And then there'd be other moms that would say, Oh no, don't worry about it. So I just, I think that helped too, like just knowing that every, every mama has the same questions and is worrying about the same thing. So, yeah, I think that really helped too.

Kaile Hunt 27:09
I love that you mentioned that, because I feel like we all, I mean, I downloaded a pregnancy app as well, and I tracked, and then I think it turned into, like a newborn tracker or whatever. Anyway, it also, yeah, it totally had the whole forum site, and so I remember searching within that forum and looking at answers. Love that you mentioned that we got more questions coming up. But first, let's take a quick break. Welcome back to newbies. We are continuing our topic on baby milestones. So we covered, you know, the stress of baby milestones, what to do, maybe, what not to do, not go to Dr Google all the time, even though I've been there. But first question, I'm gonna throw this question back to Allie. Let's see. Let's say your kid, you know, is kind of lagging and crawling a little bit you are getting a little concerned. What are some tips that you can implement before maybe seeking help to get your baby to crawl?

Allison Chisholm 28:08
Yeah, totally. I actually have this is going backwards a little bit, but I just as like as an aside as a pediatric PT and mom myself, I feel like at every single pediatrician appointment or whenever your kiddo turns 12 months, exactly, everyone's asking if your baby's walking. At least, that was my experience. Oh yes. I found that, like, even somebody that is versed in this field, that was stressful for me. But just to, like, give you an idea too, like my kiddos crawled or crawled walked, but might be considered, quote, unquote late to some people. But my first walked at 14 and a half months, and my second is 14 months today, and she's like, just starting to take her first steps. So just to, like, give people some hope that if your baby isn't walking by 11 months or 13 months, or whatever the case may be, there, the range for walking is so broad that's really hard to compare baby to baby, if that makes sense.

Kaile Hunt 29:06
Really quick. Just a quick follow up question, what is considered like walking for say, and I know it kind of changes really fast. I remember my daughter was holding onto the couch and walking, and then she was taking, you know, her wobbly two or three steps, and then it just full on. Was just walking. Could you count for a new mom? Could they count, you know, the first few wobbly steps here and there? Does that technically count as walking, or is it really more so, like, from point A to point B?

Erica Castanan 29:31
Yeah, so

Allison Chisholm 29:32
for for me, I think it's more of like, purposeful walking from point A to point B, but that doesn't like negate the steps that led up to that so in the sense that, like all of those skills, like being able to hold on and take steps, like being able to use a walker and take steps like taking those first wobbly steps, they all count, and they're all part of the process of getting to independent walking. When a baby is really using walking as their main form of mobility, they. That's when I say, okay. That means that that baby is independently walking without external support, if that makes sense. So for instance, my 14 month old, she's taken like, three to four steps at a time by herself, but she still prefers to crawl like her comfort is crawling. So for me, I don't say that she's necessarily independently walking yet, but at a point when she's like, okay, like, I can do this, and is exploring that more and using that as your main form of mobility, that's when I would say, okay, she's now independently walking. Does that make sense?

Kaile Hunt 30:29
Oh, yeah, I love that. I definitely think that is helpful to, like, make sure you narrow down exactly when it helps. Doesn't necessarily count, although it is an important milestone, yeah,

Allison Chisholm 30:40
yeah, it's like a mini stone. Like, I call those like the mini stones, or, like a lot of therapists call those like the mini stones of like, meeting those smaller skills that are helping build up to that larger scale, or that bigger milestone, like walking, for instance.

Kaile Hunt 30:56
I guess my next question is for Liz, um So, and I love that. Ali, you mentioned this, but this the stress of doctors asking if your kid is hitting the milestones. I remember I would go in and I would just get this checkoff list right, and I would fill it out, but then I felt like because I was checking off what they wanted to see, they didn't really go into depth with me and that matter about my daughter and her milestones anyway. Do you have any tips for new moms who are gonna get this checklist, you know, Liz and to give them, I guess. How did that impact you when you went into the doctor for your son and if they were hitting their milestones? I guess, what are the tips I'm trying to say for new moms to talk to their doctor about baby milestones? Yeah.

Speaker 2 31:37
So I actually, well, I have actually story where I was kind of concerned about something that, not that necessarily he was hitting I guess, but I think it was during the four month stage when your baby kind of starts flipping over a little bit, or like when they're sleeping, or like they're on their tummy time. I think that's when my baby started flipping over. But one thing I was really worried about with him is that he, um, would only sleep like on one side of his head, like his head would always be to the right, and he didn't want to turn it to the left. And I think that was kind of hard when I would put him, like on tummy time, he didn't like moving his head a lot, or like to the side, to the certain side. And I remember I went to the pediatrician, and I kind of asked them, because I was worried. And then I know some people were kind of like, No, it's nothing to worry about. But I'm kind of glad I did ask that question, because he actually did need therapy to turn to his left side, and I had to take him for a couple months when he was, like, four to six months to get therapy, because just he wouldn't turn his head. And I was kind of worried about that. So I don't know if that was a milestone that they're supposed to hit or not. I think it was just something was wrong, and I just kind of asked because I was worried, and I'm just glad that I listened to my gut. I don't think I was nervous. I think I just kind of realized, no, this doesn't seem right, like I'm just gonna ask anyway, and I think that that really helped, because I don't know what would have happened like if I would have let it continue. So yeah,

Kaile Hunt 33:15
I love that. I love that you listened to your mom gut, and that you went with your you know what you felt like was right, and I'm glad that you did get your son some help. That's awesome. I guess my next question Erica is, and you kind of talked about it a little bit, but can you just talk a little bit more for, I guess, the moms of multiples, and how you try to navigate not comparing the two and sometimes comparing the two. I know sometimes that can help as well, but I guess, how do you navigate that with your Tucson milestones?

Erica Castanan 33:45
So part of my job, I actually work with parents of first time college students, and this year we had a panel of parents of college students who I work with, and a lot of them are a lot older. Their kids are probably my age or older. And what it was funny to listen to, and something I resonated with is one of them said, you always remember what your first child did. And I do. I have, like, vivid memories of that, but my my fiance like he was gone for work most of those early months for our first son, and he has been here more with our second son. So for him, he's kind of experiencing it all through for like, the first time with me, and so I think he kind of keeps me off of the comparison track with both of them, because he doesn't really know what I'm referring to when I say, well, Luke did this. My oldest, Luke did this a certain way, but John does it this way, or youngest does it a different way. He has no, no way to reference back to that. So I think it is good to kind of keep them separate, but I think it just relieves you of the pressure to have to you. Have those things checked off that list that you're keeping for yourself, and it gives you, I think, more confidence, and speaking up to what like was, was speaking to speaking to your pediatrician or to somebody else if you do need extra support or help or talking. You know, I think another thing for us as a family. We're working parents, and we work outside the home. So both of our our sons are in daycare, and so we talk with their daycare providers about things that they're noticing or things that they want us to work on with the boys at home. And so I think that really helps us. But I just thought it was really funny that I could hear it from an older parents perspective, and I didn't want that to necessarily be the case, that I would only just remember what Luke did and I can remember what John has done, but it just alleviates some of that pressure and stress that we are talking about when we talk about milestones. That

Kaile Hunt 35:54
is great. I I just love that your fiance is like, taking it all in, and then he's probably telling you, like, Guess what he did, you know, at this age, and you're like, yeah, that's pretty normal. I love it. That's great. Last question for you Allie is, how can our listeners work with you? You know, you mentioned a little bit about where you work and your Instagram handle, of course, but how can our listeners work with you, or even check you out to see your tips and tricks that you so graciously post. Yeah.

Allison Chisholm 36:27
So I, I have my Instagram account where people can access free information. I post about, like, different exercise ideas and milestones, all sorts of stuff related to, like, Mom related things. So that's at the moving peanut. So anyone can feel free to follow me there and then. I also work with people in home in seacoast, New Hampshire, or virtually worldwide. So if anyone has any specific questions or concerns, I always offer a free consult for people to pick my mind a little bit and see if they if services would be helpful for them. So that's something that they can access either by reaching out to me on Instagram or through my website, which is www the moving peanut.com So yeah, that's Oh. And I also have a Facebook group. So one thing that I've noticed in my care in pediatrics is that there is so much focus on baby and child development, which is obviously very important. But what I see as a gap, as something that's missing, is that there's not a lot of support for mom. Because typically, although not always the case, but Mom is typically the default parent. The parent always coming to therapy and services, and I can see how much weight this, like any sort of developmental issues, puts on the mom, whether it's blame or guilt or anything like that, so I create a Facebook group called relaxed mamas and strong babies to help support the evolution and the evolution of mom as well as the growth and development of baby. So that can be a dual process, versus just solely focusing on the baby, since if mom's not thriving, then baby will also not be thriving. So that's just something that I created as well. I

Kaile Hunt 38:11
love that. I'm a huge fan of Facebook groups. I don't know why. Maybe because I'm a millennial. I don't know. I love Facebook groups. I will definitely be including that into our show notes, which is great. Yeah. Thank you all so much, and all of our guests who joined us for this episode today is definitely one of my favorites. Be sure to check out new mommy media.com we have all our podcast episodes plus videos and more foreign music

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Disclaimer 39:24
This has been a new mommy media production. The information and material contained in this episode are presented for educational purposes only. Statements and opinions expressed in this episode are not necessarily those of new mommy media and should not be considered facts while such information and materials are believed to be accurate. It is not intended to replace or substitute for professional medical advice or care, and should be used for diagnosing or treating healthcare problem or disease or prescribing any medication if you have questions. Concerns regarding your physical or mental health or the health of your baby, please seek assistance from a qualified health care provider you.

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