Kaile Hunt 0:10
You are out of the newborn haze and are starting to feel more like yourself. You want to meet up with your girlfriends who have babies similar in age, but you are wondering how beneficial it is to have your babies hang out. Today we are diving more into baby milestones and how having baby playdates can be beneficial for your little one's development. Thanks for joining us. This is newbies.
Kaile Hunt 0:57
Welcome to newbies. My name is Kaile hunt, and I'll be your host today. If you haven't already, be sure to visit our website, new mommy media.com and subscribe to our weekly newsletter, which keeps you updated on all the episodes we release each week. Another great way to stay updated is to hit that subscribe button in your podcast app. And if you're looking for a way to get even more involved with our show, then check out our online community. It's called Mighty moms. That's where we chat more about the topics discussed here on our show, and it's also an easy way to learn about our recording. So you can join us live. Our expert today is Dr Suma. Metla Suma is a physical therapist who specializes in pediatric care. She received her doctorate in physical therapy in 2015 at Florida International University and pediatric training at Arnold and Winnie Palmer hospitals for women and children. She has treated infants in keiki across all the Hawaiian Islands. Moving to Hawaii, she noticed that there is a significant lack of support for new parents. As new parenthood can be a lonely and stressful time. She wanted to give parents access to resources, guidance and communities. They need to not only ease their worries, but set them up for a healthy development for their keiki. With this three little ducks was born. Dr Suma, thank you so much for joining us today. Please tell us more about three little ducks and your family.
Dr. Suma Metla 2:19
Hi, thank you for having me on and thank you for the introduction. I'm a new mom. My baby just turned three months a couple days ago, so I'm just exiting the newborn phase and entering infanthood with my little one. But as you mentioned, I felt like in Hawaii there was such a need for families to have community and to have a place to learn about their baby's development. So we offer baby classes for families to learn how to engage with their baby and play and to meet other families if a baby happens to fall behind on their milestones. We also have physical therapy available to families.
Kaile Hunt 2:55
I love that. I also love that you have such like a credentialed background, and you host meetups, because you can see, you know, hey, these kids are coming over this keiki. Keiki, for our non Hawaii listeners, is just kids. I love that word, but keiki are coming and you can kind of notice, like, hey, maybe they're not rolling according to plan, or maybe they're not crawling yet. I love that you have the knowledge to help mamas prepare them and also be on the lookout if things like this does occur
Dr. Suma Metla 3:22
exactly it's so important, and that's why all our classes are taught by pediatric experts. So we have a speech language pathologist and an occupational therapist on our team to help with that. And I think it's so important to normalize that it's okay if a baby falls behind on their milestones, where it is important is to identify that early so we can help families get back on track and help their baby be as successful as possible.
Kaile Hunt 3:46
I love that. Well, I'm excited to have you on and we're gonna dive deep into all of that. We also have a few mamas here with us today. We love it when moms join. Natalie is a mama to an adorable one year old boy. Natalie Juarez, thank you so much for joining us. Please tell us more about your family. Hi,
Nathaly Juarez 4:04
everyone. My name is Natalie, and I'm so excited that you invited me. And I have a 16 month old boy, and now, right now, he is just getting into everything. I love seeing all his milestones. He's really curious about everything around him, and I just love seeing him grow into his own little person. And I'm just really excited to talk about being a first time mom.
Kaile Hunt 4:30
I love that. And fun fact, both of our kids, Natalie and mine, it's like, what weeks apart they were born, weeks apart. So I love that we're both in the same age range right now, which is great. We definitely probably can touch back and think of, okay, yeah, I remember at six months and nine months, which is fun. We also have Lauren Laura on the episode too. Lauren is a mom of two, and her oldest recently turned two. Did I get that correct? I think I did. Yeah, I thought I saw that. Oh. More and thank you for being here. Please tell us more about your family.
Lauren Lora 5:03
Yeah, we have two little ones. Our youngest, Michelle, she just turned one a month ago, and our oldest, Nathan, just turned two three days ago. So very recently, they are 11 months apart, so it's been a lot on both of us as parents. We have our hands full for sure, but they're doing great. We love it, and we're crazy busy, and it's just psychotic all the time. But we love it so much, so so much we want to have a third Oh,
Kaile Hunt 5:32
I love hearing that, and I love this is a positive aspect, because you did two under two, which is,
Lauren Lora 5:38
oh, yeah, why? Under one,
Kaile Hunt 5:39
they're so crazy. I love that you have such a positive outlook. Let me guess today must have been a good
Lauren Lora 5:45
day, always. I mean, most of the time, yeah,
Kaile Hunt 5:49
I love that, yay. Well, thank you so much for joining us. This is a great group, so I will also be timing in on my experience with navigating the stress of making playdates fun for both myself and my daughter, and also tracking milestones. And I also want to talk a little bit about what happens if you're on a playdate and your kids a little behind the kids that are on the playdate. I think that's a topic we should discuss as well, but first we will take a quick break. Today we're discussing the importance of baby playdates and how it can impact your child's milestones positively. So first section is for Dr Summa metla. First, let's chat about baby milestones. What are some social and motor milestones to look out for, for infants, and let's break it down to like, three months, six months and nine months.
Lauren Lora 6:39
Great. There
Dr. Suma Metla 6:40
is so much happening in this first year with your baby, especially when it comes to motor milestones. So around that three to six month range, you're probably going to see your baby starting to roll. And between four and eight months, you're going to look for your baby to start sitting. And between eight and 11 months, you should start seeing your baby crawl and starting to pull to stand. And then after that, between about 11 to 16 months, you should start to see your baby starting to take those first steps. And between this first year of life, when it comes to social skills, we're really looking for your baby to start engaging with whoever their adult is, where, whether it's mom, dad, grandma, caregiver, and having them engage in like, back and forth, play back and forth, babbling and talking and engaging with the mirror. Within this first year, we're not really expecting too much to happen with babies really interacting and playing with other babies. But what the cool thing is that's happening at this age is babies are observing and noticing everything. So even if you don't see your baby interacting with another baby, they're taking it all in, and it's providing great modeling for your baby. So if you're around a baby who's a couple months ahead of yours, that's a great opportunity for your baby to see what you know maybe standing looks like, or what crawling looks like, so they have an idea of what's going to happen to them in the next couple months.
Kaile Hunt 8:05
I love that. And so how can playdates? You kind of talked a little bit about this, but how can playdates change, especially tracking milestones from like four months to six months to nine months. I remember me and a girlfriend who was from my birth class, so our babies were very close in age. We at four months, they would do like tummy time in the park together. And then at six months, my daughter was crawling. Her daughter wasn't yet crawling, but close behind mine, and so they were kind of crawling with each other. Anyway. How can play dates change? You know, as a baby, you know, changes their motor milestones?
Dr. Suma Metla 8:36
Yeah, I think a lot of what changes is how you set up your play date. If you're having a play date, you know, with a couple of three to four month olds, you want to have that floor ready for babies to roll around, for them to do tummy time, for them to look up while they're on their tummies. So in this case, you want mommy's or caregivers on the floors with babies so they are interacting with baby as babies become more mobile and they're sitting upright, they're crawling and starting to walk in cruise, then your environment might change a little bit. You may be looking for toys to be out. So beanies are moving towards the toys they're getting out of that fun sitting position. And you may want to have things around that babies can pull up on. So if you are having a playdate at home, you may want to set up that playdate in your living room so they have that sofa to pull up on and to cruise along. I
Kaile Hunt 9:26
love that. And how can playdates be beneficial for new moms and their infants? We talked a little bit about, you know, infants looking at older babies and kind of taking the scopes in. But how can it also be beneficial for moms?
Dr. Suma Metla 9:39
I think playdates are everything for moms. As I mentioned, I'm a pretty new mom, and I didn't understand the power of a playdate until I entered this phase of my life. I think it's a great way for moms to connect, to have that social support, especially if you live in an area where you may not have family support. Having a playdate is a great. Great way for you to talk to another mom about what you're going through, to either have validation, to get support, to get advice, and it's just an awesome way to also build relationships for your babies as they get older, they get to have friends that they get to grow up with. I
Kaile Hunt 10:15
love that, and that kind of takes us into the next question. But where can moms go to find other moms to have playdates and little plug three little ducks classes? But tell us more like, what are some ways that moms can, you know, find other moms for playdates? Well, if
Dr. Suma Metla 10:34
you live on Oahu in Hawaii, you could always come to three little ducks. We have BB classes. We do social events like BB parties, and mom walks and dad walks, and that's a great way to meet other parents who are in the same stage of life as you, if you're not in Hawaii, there are so many other ways to meet parents. There are so many Facebook groups. There are probably other play groups in your community. I think Google is a great helpful tool to find them, but I find that a lot of families meet their friends just going to the park. If you are going to the same place, you can talk to them about, you know, oh, I'll be here tomorrow at 2pm and it's a great way to, like, slowly build up a relationship you're, if you're feeling a little bit nervous about, you know, befriending someone new and and having a structured play date.
Kaile Hunt 11:20
I definitely agree with that. And I also think, and you touched on it, and I'm just touching on it again, that even though, like, if I had a one year old, it's totally fine for them to hang out with two and three year olds two or vice versa, if I had a four month old, it is totally okay for them to hang out with a little bit older kids as one and two, because I feel like it's so beneficial, and I feel like it's beneficial for everyone. I remember when I was in like, a group setting, and I had, like, a six month old at the time, the one and two year olds were like sharing their toys with her, and it was the cutest thing, you know. And so here they're learning to share, and here my daughter is learning to see what they're doing, you know. So it's so beneficial despite the ages as well. And we're back talking about baby milestones this time we are hearing from the mama. So first question, I'm going to toss it over to Lauren, because I am really intrigued. You got two under one? Um, tell me how often did you try to get out of the house with your little one? We can break it up two into two parts with just your first kid, and then once you welcomed in that second baby, how often did you get out of the house? And I want to kind of set realistic expectations for new moms, because I'll be honest, I didn't leave the house very often the first three to four months.
Lauren Lora 12:42
my goodness, well, my first one, it was a C section. So I was definitely healing at home, and then, whoops, we got pregnant when he was five weeks old. So it was very soon, very sudden. I definitely did not leave the house much at all, because I was, one still healing from a C section surgery, and two, just tired from being pregnant again. But we tried to go out of the house as soon as we could, when we could, with my husband's help, of course, just to the park or just around the grocery store or to family's houses. We didn't do much, to be honest. So yeah, not much at all, maybe just some running errands, but mainly we were just home kind of relaxing and healing up. And then when my second came along, my son still wasn't quite fully walking yet. We had some friends with similar aged children that we would meet up with sometimes, but mainly just errands. And I mean, they're so young, and I was still healing from another C section with my second so we didn't really leave the house too much. We had a lot of people over here and there, but yeah, like I said, just errands and staying home for the most part in the first couple of months.
Kaile Hunt 13:53
I love like that's really the newborn face, which is when you know mama and baby are bonding, and I think that's important. So when did you start to get out, and even if it's with family and cousins, when did you start to get out and try and do some playdates really early
Lauren Lora 14:06
on, actually, a couple months into it, my girlfriend, like I said, has a girl the same age as my boy, and she has a boy the same age as my girl, so it's kind of been nice easing into mommyhood with her and our Same aged children, and she became a really good friend of mine too. So it's been really beneficial to get a really good girlfriend in the process of having your friends make or your kids make friends. But we started hanging out with our littles when they were, like, two months old. No? So yeah, really early on. And we just, we try to have play days at least once a week together with our kiddos. And, yeah, we still do it all the time. Oh, I
Kaile Hunt 14:44
love that. And I love finding, like, I had a before I left Hawaii, I had a really good mom friend where, like, I could go to her house, she could come to my house. House was messy. No one cared.
Lauren Lora 14:53
No one cares. We were pajamas. Yeah,
Kaile Hunt 14:57
it was wonderful. So just having. That good relationship is good for the kids and good for the mall.
Lauren Lora 15:03
Exactly.
Kaile Hunt 15:04
Natalie, I'll jump the question over to you, how often did you try and get out of the house with your little one? And then when did you start really trying to do some playdates?
Nathaly Juarez 15:13
Honestly, I did not leave my house like you until, like, probably four months in. And yep, yeah, like, the only place that I would go is just like, if I was going to the grocery store just to do, like, a quick errand, just to clear my mind a little bit, just from being at home all day with the baby. And then when I did start planning stuff, I started by taking a massage class that was offered here in Fresno. And so I went weekly, and we learned how to do different massage techniques for babies, depending on on, like, what was going on with them. So like to help them with constipation or if they were just feeling irritable or trying to calm them down. And it was just really helpful just to connect with other moms and just talk about babies and just it was really helpful also to just get out of the house and do some activities and learn something as well.
Kaile Hunt 16:17
I love that you just jumped into my next question. So the class you took was for infant massage. I love that. Did you meet other moms in that class?
Nathaly Juarez 16:24
I did, and a lot of the women that were in that class were first time moms, and they were also trying to learn different techniques on on and and learn about the benefits of massaging babies, which I didn't even know was a thing, and then, like, I remember even telling my mom about it. She was like, oh, yeah, I used to do this when you guys were babies. I was like, You should have told me. And, yeah, it was, like, a good conversation. And I just found, found it very helpful as well.
Kaile Hunt 17:01
I love that my next question, and I know this is true for me, Did anyone find playdates kind of stressful? So I did my daughter, and she still does not love the car she when she was younger, went to scream and scream, whether it was five minutes or 15 minutes, and it didn't matter what I would do, I would sing songs. I would have Miss Rachel playing in the car. I needed my phone to drive, but I would like have the music on in the car. I would it didn't matter what I would do. I had to plan a playdate around, especially in the newborn days and the infant days, around her nap, so she would fall asleep in the car. So I found getting to the playdate stressful. Once I got to the playdate, it was much better. She was awake and alert and happy. Did anyone else kind of find whether it's setting up playdates with schedules or getting to the playdates kind of stressful? Ask you, Lauren, first,
Lauren Lora 17:55
I feel like it's always super stressful with the nap schedules, because every single mother I've met has a different nap schedule for their children, because they're like, let's meet at 10 or 11. And I'm like, my kids are not being at that time. What about noon? And they're like, my kids are not being at that time. So that has always been a giant headache with trying to meet up with anybody or do anything or, you know. So that is always number one, yeah. And then my son has been kind of in a rough stage. I think he might be a little jealous of his baby sister, so I always get nervous bringing him around other kiddos. He's always done really great. He's fantastic. Just in my back of the head, I'm like, he's gonna hit someone or bite someone, and he never has, luckily, just his little sister at home. But,
Kaile Hunt 18:36
um, yeah, that's funny.
Lauren Lora 18:37
I think we just have anxiety in general of our children and making sure they're perfect little angels, and making sure they're not tired. And, you know, every little thing that we think of, but everything turns out just great, exactly,
Kaile Hunt 18:49
exactly. And Natalie, what about you? Did you ever find making playdates a little stressful?
Nathaly Juarez 18:54
I didn't even really attempt because at first I did, and then I just kind of gave up on it, but I we did have, like, unplanned play dates with my son's cousins, and those were unplanned, but, yeah, it can get a little bit challenging trying to coordinate schedules, especially if you're trying to keep them on their schedule and he doesn't get interrupted with her napping time.
Kaile Hunt 19:23
I agree. I definitely agree. When did you notice maddale says for you, when did you notice your son was copying other kids? So during the playdates with the cousins, would you notice him, like picking up a toy or like stacking a block? Similarly?
Nathaly Juarez 19:37
Yeah, he has cousins that are like five and six. So he was trying to copy them. But then he has a cousin that is two weeks younger than him, and he was actually teaching him how to stack little blocks, you know, which I was just really, really happy that he was. The one that was teaching another kid what to do, but he was really imitating what the or trying to copy what the kid older kids were trying to do.
Kaile Hunt 20:10
I love that. And then, Lauren, what about you? So your son is the older one, and your daughter correct is the younger one. So how is that dynamic? Is he, you know, playing with toys? Obviously, he's a whole year older, right? So is he playing with toys? And she's kind of watching. I mean, I feel like a year is a big difference, but then not so much, you know, I
Lauren Lora 20:33
know it really hasn't been too much of a difference, like she'll copy whatever he does all the time, because she's just admires him, and he really doesn't care for her, to be honest. Sometimes he's very jealous, but then sometimes I can hear them just screaming, laughing with each other, and they do play together, but he'll grab a toy and she'll, like, run up and want to play the same toy, and then he gets jealous. It just depends on the day, but they can be reading a book together in the corner quietly, or playing with a toy together or fighting over a toy. So I love that. I love that it's all over the place.
Kaile Hunt 21:05
Perfect. Well, we got more questions coming up, but first, let's take another break. Welcome back to newbies. We are continuing our topic on playdates and baby social milestones. So next question I have, let's jump with Dr Suma back into the conversation. I know you spoke a little bit earlier about, you know, different play dates and meeting with moms. I'm curious to see what are some good playdate ideas. So listed I have, like, Park dates, aquarium dates, coffee dates, I kind of want to jot down and pick your brain a little bit. When would be a good time to have a play date? Let's say at the zoo. Like, what age range would be a good zoo play date? Because obviously a three month old could care less about looking at elephants. However, when babies are babbling and talking around nine to 12 months, it could be a good idea. And what about like an aquarium date? So I'm kind of curious, zoo dates, aquarium dates and then just a park date. What are some good age ranges that you think would be good to bring your kids to? Yeah, I
Dr. Suma Metla 22:06
think you hit it right on the head with the zoo dates, going around that time where babies are babbling and starting to point is really fun. As far as aquarium dates, I think you can go starting like, you know, month two, month three with B is such a great sensory experience for those little ones, for them to experience, looking at all the animals, seeing the differences in light and the water is excellent. And then Park dates you can start. I think it's most fun to start around the seven, eight month mark, right when babies are starting to pivot, get in and out of sitting, probably starting to get ready to crawl. And as far as other playdate ideas, I love looking to see what community events are happening. This morning, there was a Free Kids event with the symphony, and so I went with my three month old, and we met up with other friends who had babies who are 18 months and kids who are four years old. And it was a really great way for the kids to get together, even though they're across a great span of ages. I love
Kaile Hunt 23:09
that. And a quick follow up question, so let's just throw a scenario out there. You're at a, you know, Park Day, and you have a, you know, nine month old, and you know, your friend has a 10 month old, and then there's a seven month old. What happens if maybe you notice that your kid is a little behind and maybe the seven month old is doing something you know that your kid isn't doing, I guess. How can you bring the worry out of it for parents? Um, I kind of know. I want to ask you questions like that, so if you notice your kid isn't really, you know, I don't know crawling as great as the seventh month old is right, I guess. What would you what tips would you get for parents? Yeah,
Dr. Suma Metla 23:45
great question. I'm sure for that parent, it is scary. It gives you a lot of anxiety. I think what might be helpful is to talk to those parents that you're with and ask them, Hey, when did your baby start crawling? When did your baby start doing this milestone? And that might give you a little bit of information, but don't use that as you know, the only information you gather, my recommendation is to follow up with your healthcare provider, whether it's your pediatrician or your family doctor, to talk about those concerns. Like I said, earlier, the quicker and faster we identify if a baby's falling behind on their milestones, the quicker we can get them back on track. If we get them you know, the appropriate interventions that they need. I
Kaile Hunt 24:26
love that, and I think early intervention is definitely key. And so what would be your tips for early intervention? So let's say, you know, someone's kid isn't really crawling by 12 months, right? And they get referred to you, what would be some tips you would work on with them or with the whole family to help mom and dad kind of navigate this,
Dr. Suma Metla 24:45
yeah, great question again. I think what's really important is finding out what that family lifestyle is, what is feasible for them to do. You know, there are some families that are working, you know, 12 hour day shifts, so when we. See them for therapy, we may need to tell them or give them activities that can be done in like a small, 510, minute spurt. And then we may have other parents who are at home all day with their baby and really want to tackle working on this milestone so we can give them activities that you know could take up to an hour each day. And I think that's the real important piece with getting therapy is making sure it's personalized to you, your baby and your family, and also the environment you live in. You know, some families live in apartments that are really small. We've other families that live in large spaces. So we want to make sure everything we're doing fits them and their lifestyle. I
Kaile Hunt 25:38
love that. My next question for the mamas is, how, and I know, Lauren, you mentioned a little bit about having playdates semi regularly, but how regularly would you give advice to have playdates for a new mom, like, I would say, I'm gonna try and get out monthly. You know? What would be your advice for new moms who are like, Okay, I'm ready to get out of the house. How often should I really be getting out with my baby and having these playdates.
Lauren Lora 26:01
I mean, it's all buried on each individual Of course, I try to do it at least once a week. I mean, I'm a stay at home mom, and I have two babies and two dogs. I'm like, nobody talks to me all day, and I miss adult interaction. So it's definitely important for the moments as well, just to get out of the house. And it's great for your kids to be around other children as well. And like you said, look at other children and their behaviors and model after them. And I think it's just great all around to get out and it feels happier. And you know, I would say once a week, maybe twice a month, I definitely
Kaile Hunt 26:35
agree, and I love just being in the same, I guess, atmosphere as other moms like who are deep trenches of motherhood, of early motherhood, right? Oh, yeah. When you talk to moms who have, like, kids who are eight and nine and sleeping through the night, and, you know, not waking up and yeah, it gives us hope. Yes, it does. It's the day uplifting, because then they're like, I barely remember those early first years. I'm like, good Heather, yeah, I love that advice. Um Natalie, you kind of mentioned about taking a baby massage class. Are there any other classes you've taken or wanted to take um with your son? No,
Nathaly Juarez 27:13
I haven't, but there is this um upcoming um zoo event that I was looking forward to. And it's a mom group that's meeting about the Fresno Chaffee Zoo, and they're just going to do like a walkthrough, and everyone's going to have their babies. And I'm just really excited for that, because I do want to get out of the house as well and meet other moms and just talk about what their kids are doing and how we can help each other as well.
Kaile Hunt 27:45
I love that. I remember this summer, I took swim classes with my daughter, and we she loves the water, and we both highly enjoyed that. So I My next question is for Dr Summa, are these, you know, Mommy and Me classes? Do that count as, like, Baby interaction, baby playdates, even though it's kind of structured sometimes with, like, a teacher, oh, 100%
Dr. Suma Metla 28:07
anytime you're taking your baby out to meet another baby, to meet another family, it all counts as playdates.
Kaile Hunt 28:14
I love that, and I love especially with I just did the swim lessons. It was fun to see that's a big age group, especially the first swim lessons. I think it's like six months to three years as some at least, that was where I went for her swim lessons. And so here I had a one year old, and so she's looking at the two year old who can actually, like, kick their feet properly and, like, do their little ice cream scoop arms. And then she's looking at the six month old who can, you know, barely hold their head up in water. And they're like, where am I? So it was fun to see a mix of ages. And then here she is right in the middle, where she can kind of blow bubbles and kind of kick her feet. It was, it was a fun mix. And I can only imagine other sorts of classes. My next question, Dr Suma, is, tell us more about the classes you guys offer with three little ducks. Great. Thank
Dr. Suma Metla 28:58
you for asking. So at three little ducks. We have baby development classes. Our classes range from babies at three months old all the way to 18 months old, and we separate the classes out based on babies developmental milestones. Our classes are taught by pediatric experts, so we have a physical therapist, a speech pathologist or occupational therapist. So we have motor classes, sensory classes and communication classes. And what the point of the classes is to teach parents how to engage their baby and play, to meet those developmental milestones. We never want our classes to feel like homework or like they're coming up, like a like they're going to school. We want it to feel fun and playful and for people to feel like, wow, this is something I can replicate at home. We want families to learn tools in class, to be able to use them at home in their everyday life.
Kaile Hunt 29:48
I love that, and I love the whole family environment of that. I think that is so important, especially in the early days, where can people learn more about your organization?
Dr. Suma Metla 29:59
Sure they can go to our website, which is three little ducks hawaii.com or you can follow us on Instagram, or Tiktok at three little ducks, Hawaii, perfect.
Kaile Hunt 30:09
And also in our show notes, as well as on our website, we will have your Instagram handle and your website information as well. I want to thank all of the guests for today who joined us? This was a great episode. Be sure to check out new mommy media.com or we have all our podcast episodes, plus videos and more.
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Disclaimer 31:16
This has been a new mommy media production. The information and material contained in this episode are presented for educational purposes only. Statements and opinions expressed in this episode are not necessarily those of new mommy media and should not be considered facts. While such information and materials are believed to be accurate, it is not intended to replace or substitute for professional medical advice or care and should be used for diagnosing or treating healthcare problem or disease or prescribing any medication. If you have questions or concerns regarding your physical or mental health or the health of your baby, please seek assistance from a qualified healthcare provider you